Relationship & Attachment Therapy in New York
When relationships feel confusing or painful
You may find yourself repeating patterns you don’t fully understand. You want closeness yet feel overwhelmed when you get it. You crave reassurance but struggle to trust it. You withdraw when hurt, or alternatively pursue when anxious.
Relationships may feel disproportionately activating. You might ask yourself:
Why does this keep happening?
Why do I react this way?
Why do I feel so much, or sometimes so little?
For many people, these patterns are rooted in early attachment experiences, relational trauma, or environments where emotional needs were unmet, unpredictable, or unsafe.
Relationship struggles can also intensify during periods of grief, loss, or major life transition, moments when old attachment wounds are often reactivated.
What this can look like
These patterns show up differently for different people. You might find yourself:
Pulling away from people you care about when things feel too close
Staying in relationships that don’t feel good because leaving feels worse
Feeling a persistent anxiety in dating or partnership that you can’t quite explain
Struggling to ask for what you need or feeling ashamed that you need it at all
Being drawn to people who are emotionally unavailable, and not fully understanding why
Moving through conflict in ways that leave both you and the other person feeling worse
Finding sexual intimacy complicated, distant, or fraught
These patterns are not flaws. They reflect how you’ve had to adapt to your early attachment figures, relational environments, and life experiences.
For some, burnout or chronic stress can further erode relational capacity, making it harder to stay emotionally present, connected, or open in partnership.
A relational, psychodynamic approach
Because therapy is itself a relationship, we pay attention to how familiar dynamics show up in the room between us - not just as something to talk about but as something to actually work with in real time.
We explore how early experiences shaped your sense of what’s safe in relationships, what you learned to expect from others, and what you learned to hide or suppress in order to stay connected. We look at the beliefs you hold about your own worth and lovability, often ones you’ve never put into words. And we pay attention to how all of this gets expressed through your body - the tightness, tension, numbness, disconnection - because these patterns are physiological just as much as they are psychological.
This work often includes understanding the impact of trauma on how safe closeness feels today.
For couples, I integrate attachment-based and Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help partners understand each other beneath the defensiveness that may currently be getting in the way of real closeness.
Change happens not just through insight, but through experiencing a different kind of relational dynamic: one that prioritizes authenticity, emotional safety, and transparency.
Identity & Belonging
My work is LGBTQ+ affirming, and I support individuals and couples exploring how identity, sexuality, and belonging intersect with relational patterns and attachment experiences.
Whether navigating dating, partnership, family relationships, or questions of self-definition, therapy offers a space where these experiences can be explored without judgment.
If you’re ready to explore your relationship patterns at their roots, I’d welcome the chance to connect.